Mother nature has been testing our resiliency this spring …. Winter storm alerts, freezing rain, ice storms, flooding in the streets, high winds, and foggy days!
Our weekly Monday morning “goal setting” group meeting this past week mirrored the dreary weather outlook. The usually upbeat, high-energy and goal-oriented group was subdued and disenchanted. Forget a coffee jolt …. What we needed was a dose of inspiration! As a result, the focus of our roundtable discussion evolved from our usual weekly goal setting (which we still did) to include ideas and best practices that help build resiliency.
During the session, I couldn’t help but to reflect back to a leadership-psychometric test I had taken a few years ago. Interestingly, it revealed that my very strength also happened to be one of the biggest challenges I faced as a leader.
“You easily inspire and motivate those around you; your high energy drive and charisma can light up a room” …. Then came the kicker ….. “however, because those around you are drawn to and inspired by your energy, any downward periods in your energy levels and motivation can have a spiralling negative effect on your team“.
No one can be “ON” all the time, we all face adversity and experience periods of both peaks and valleys in our every day lives. The solution was not simply “putting on a fake smile” or signing up for acting classes. It needed – I needed – to be authentic! From that moment forward, building and maintaining resiliency became a key personal and professional development goal of mine.
Resilience (noun) or Resiliency (noun)
“Able to recover quickly from misfortune; able to return to original form after being bent, compressed, or stretched out of shape. A human ability to recover quickly from disruptive change, or misfortune without being overwhelmed or acting in dysfunctional or harmful ways.” — Al Seibert, Resiliency Center
In his best selling book, “The Resiliency Advantage“, Al Siebert describes resilient people as:
- flexible, adapt to new circumstances quickly and thrive in constant change;
- they expect to bounce back from adversity and feel confident that they will;
- they have a knack of creating good luck out of circumstances that many others see as bad luck;
- they are adept at seeing things from another person’s point of view.
Given the pace of change that’s taking place in all aspects of our lives, resiliency and adaptability is no longer a “nice-to-have”, but a core foundational skill. As leaders, we not only need to ensure we are resilient, but we also need to ensure we build resilient and highly adaptive teams.
Mother Nature may be having a good laugh at our expense, but I’m not letting a winter storm in spring break me! Here are some tips from my “resilience playbook” that I’ve come to rely on.
1. Changing the Narrative:
This is my “glass half full” outlook. I want to emphasize that this is NOT about ignoring stress and adversity and pretending it’s not there … trust me, I am very much a realist. However, rather than focusing on the problem itself, I try to “reframe” it and instead focus on solutions. As a leader, this is a non-negotiable for me, as it’s my responsibility to set the direction and build a culture of looking forward.
2. Be Prepared:
“The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails” — William Arthur Ward
We cannot control change, eliminate stress and wish-away adversity, however, we can prepare ourselves. Maybe it’s the former Girl Scout in me, but I work very hard at making preparation and planning a “habit”, rather than an outcome. I set weekly goals for myself – both professionally and personally – and devise my action plan to achieve these goals (depending on the goal, this can take the form of a simply mental outline or a formal action plan). It has now become second-nature to me, that when adversity does surprise me, I quickly revert to reframing the issue, establishing a vision/goal and an action plan towards achieving it.
3. Volunteering in the Community:
For me, volunteering in the community and challenging myself “outside the office” has always played an integral role in my professional development. Not only is it inspiring and motivating to help others thrive, the learnings that I have been able to take-away from my volunteer activities have far outweighed my contributions. I’ve been able to gain new experiences and “build my resume” through community work in ways that I would never be able to do had I not volunteered …. and it’s these experiences that have given me the confidence to “bounce back” when adversity strikes.
I also encourage those on my team to volunteer with organizations and causes close to their heart as well … I make time during our feedback/coaching discussions to learn about their volunteer activities, and incorporate this community building into their professional development plans as well.
4. Self Care:
One of the most important facet to building resilience is self-care and specifically, our physical well-being. This entails healthy eating, regular exercise and sleeping well. We always admire the resilience of children …. When they fall, they get up, brush themselves off, and get back to it! We can learn a great deal from children. Look no further than a classroom, where recess (mental and physical break from the curriculum) is not only encouraged, it’s mandatory!
As adults, we often feel time-crunched and overwhelmed with our stress …. I acknowledge that I have been guilty of foregoing physical activity to stay in the office and work. However, this strategy usually works against us. According to a research study out of Princeton University, “physical activity reorganizes the brain so that it’s response to stress is reduced and anxiety is less likely to interfere with normal brain function”. Today, irrespective of how overwhelmed and busy I feel, I carve out time for exercise, which for me, usually takes the form of walking daily and attending dance classes …. after which I almost always feel more energized, confident and ready to take on challenges!
“Work hard, play hard”! Make the time to celebrate successes, and as leaders, make sure you always take the time to recognize those on your team for their successes! In fact, why not “celebrate failure” rather than dwelling on our failures?! Take some time to reflect on what we’ve learned from the failure …. and in doing so, you’re essentially “preparing yourself and your team” for future success the next time around! And while you’re at it, have a good laugh! Laughing truly is the best medicine for stress!
6. Be Present:
This one is a new one for me, and I will be honest, I used to laugh and dismiss people who talked to me about meditation. I’m no longer laughing! In a nutshell, mindful meditation is about focusing on the present, rather than dwelling on what went wrong (past) or what could go wrong (future) …. and by doing so, it becomes much easier to see things from other perspectives and focus on solutions rather than problems. Meditation may not be for everyone, but I encourage you to give it a try and see if it’s right for you.
7. Be Authentic:
Finally, resilience is about being authentic and showing up as your “real self” …. and by that, I mean perfection is NOT required! When you accept and forgive yourself, you’ll find that you no will longer dwell on the “what if’s”, and instead will embrace learning and exploring new ideas and approaches for moving forward.
I’ve shared some activities that I do (and recommend) to build resiliency. I’m taking some of my own advice now and heading outside for a walk …. Resiliency does pay off, the sun is shining and it’s a beautiful spring morning! 🙂
Feel free to share your tips and best practices …. I’d love to hear them!